How to handle your nerves on the 1st tee

Here is the thing women tell me after their first tournament, almost word for word every time: I was terrified on the first tee, and then by the third hole I had forgotten all about it.

So let me take the first tee apart, because it is the single biggest thing standing between a lot of good golfers and a tournament they would love.

What you think is happening

You are standing on the tee. There are people behind you. There is a scorecard in somebody's hand. You are certain that every person there is about to watch you swing and form an opinion about whether you belong.

That feeling is real. The belief underneath it is not.

What is actually happening

Everybody else on that tee is thinking about their own shot.

That is not a comforting thing I made up to settle you down. It is just true. The woman next to you is running through her own swing thought. The one behind her is wondering whether she took enough club. Nobody has the spare attention to critique a stranger, because they are all busy being nervous in exactly the same way you are.

The one person who is genuinely watching is your teammate, and she wants you to hit a good shot more than anyone in the field does. She is on your side.

Six things that actually help

• Arrive early enough to be bored. Rushing turns nerves into panic. Thirty spare minutes is worth more than thirty range balls.
• Do not change anything. The first tee is not the moment for a new grip or a tip you read on the internet.
• Pick a small target. Not "the fairway" — a spot of brown grass, a bunker edge, something specific. A narrow target gives your brain something to do besides worry.
• Take one more club than you think and swing easier. Adrenaline adds distance and takes away rhythm.
• Tee it low and hit something you trust. Nobody remembers what club you opened with.
• Walk slowly afterwards. Whatever happened, walking fast makes it feel worse.

I remember the time I was in a big tournament for the company I worked for. It was my turn to hit and my nerves were in overdrive. Mind you, I feel pretty confident with my driver but for some reason this tournament and playing with people I worked with had me a bundle of nerves. Well, I got up there and wouldn't you know I whiffed it in front of everyone! I remember the embarrassment to this day, but I am confident in saying that none of them remember it at all.

So, take the time to calm your nerves, a few deep breaths and get up there and show them what you've got!

The format is on your side

Our formats are forgiving by design. In a scramble your teammate has almost certainly put one in play, so your tee shot is a free swing. In best ball a bad hole costs you nothing if she makes a score. The whole point of playing in twos is that neither of you is ever carrying it alone.

And the field is flighted, so you are not measuring yourself against the best player there.

Additionally, there is an optional practice round the day before the tournament starts. If you are nervous, take advantage of the opportunity to get in a relaxed loop before anything counts. It will help build your confidence off that first tee on the morning of the tournament.

And don't forget the welcome reception the night before the tournament. You will have had drinks and gotten to know most of the women the night before, so you won't feel like you are hitting in front of a group of strangers.

What happens after the first swing

You walk off the tee and the whole thing is behind you.

Within three holes you will be talking to your teammate about something other than golf. By the back nine you will have forgotten you were ever nervous. By dinner you will be telling the story of your first tee shot and laughing about it, and somebody at the table will tell you a worse one.

That is the actual flow of it, every single time.

The short version

Everyone is nervous. Nobody is watching. Your teammate is on your side, the format is forgiving, and the whole thing is over in ninety seconds.

Don't let first tee nerves be the reason you miss out on a fun-filled week of golf, and who knows, that first tee shot most likely will be straight down the middle and leave the others with a twinge of jealous admiration!

The 2027 GIR Club Classic at Hammock Beach runs April 11–15. Fields are capped, so join the waitlist and you will hear the day registration opens.